two face

I don't even know how I got here, but I really don't like it. It's like I'm stuck under this light in a dark room and it all comes down to me. I know I can easily make this epic better but either way I'll end up hurting someone. When things start to get better for me, something always make it complicated to stay that way, but this time I actually don't know what to do. It's beating me up inside because it's not just my happiness this time.

Earlier this month, I went on a little trip to visit my family and cousins in North Carolina, the country side of the world, my world. I loved it. You would think it would be a horrible way to spend some vacation time for a city girl, but I actually really enjoyed my time. Although there were some mishaps, it was well worth it. I miss it already.

There, I met someone. Someone who for some reason really took my attention off of everything and dedicated it to him only. I'm not even sure what about him makes me so interested. It's like he's someone I really wanted to get to know. That was what I wanted and I just had to get it.

Little did I know, I'm not such a big deal to many people. I think I just set myself up for heartbreaks and depression.

This person is so delicate to me. Someone I completely adore. But in my heart, I know I can't have him. What should I do? My heart is in two different places.